Nothing exciting

I have sat here and debated about whether or not to blog. I am having a down mood at the moment. Several reasons, but none that I will list here due to the people that read my blog. Just some things havent been right and I get tired of trying to address them and to no avail, more bullshit and disappointment. Oh well.

I am having more thoughts of moving away. I honestly dont think anyone will care or give a damn as long as they can call or visit regularly... or I know my family would expect me and K to come home frequently. And none of my friends call or email on a regular basis. L doesnt count cause we talk due to work but still manage to check in most days! LOL I have online friends that I talk to regularly cause I am always online in the evening. I just dont know anymore. Im tired of always being the one to please everyone, or feeling that its expected of me. When will others start to please me on a regular basis?? Im going to stop pleasing everyone. I think its been expected of me to do certain things cause I have been doing it for so long... and I dont feel any better about some of it.

I guess everyone has their own life and their own stuff going on and are trying to find their own way. I'll just step aside and watch from the sidelines... while thinking of where to move to so I can start the job hunt, house hunt, and get finances in order. Of course, this move prob wont be any time soon considering my lease isnt up until February. Have some other things up in the air, and the outcome of those things depends on the next move as well.

I'm hanging in. Havent had a down evening in a while. Usually my downs are all day for several days. I hope to feel better in the morning. If not, I have therapy Monday morning. That should help... especially for the $50 co-pay I relinquish at the end of the session.

Im not sleeping again. Hope this is a brief insomnia period.

Sidenote: A good friend recently told me she felt that she was asexual. I know THAT isnt my problem, and so glad cause that would make me feel much worst!